This piece is a continuation on my piece on dealing with depression, which you can read here.
I am tired of not speaking about this subject, as I have found these things to be very helpful for discovering myself and healing from deep trauma, and even physical illnesses.
I feel it is important to discuss things that are considered taboo, in hopes of breaking more of the blockages that surround discussing these topics. More this writing is about sharing my experiences, and hopefully shedding light into subjects of controversial matter, to help break them out of the realms of something that should be shunned upon.
And to cast more light into the deeper meaning of what is to communicate with plant spirits, as I walk the fine path between the spiritual and the physical, that is my role in a way.
Breaking communication barriers
George Orwell wisely said something along the lines of: “Control their language, and you control the people”.
This can be said about the topic of entheogenics (literally meaning “generating the divine within”), referring to plant medicine that is used in a healing and spiritual context.
Many of which have been made illegal or patented by big medicine companies.
Making things illegal can effectively prevent discussion about these topics, as people are afraid to speak their mind in the fear of the consequences. This is a very effective form of mind- and nation control, as those things that cannot be discussed or thought about, could as well as not exist.
I believe in free speech, free expression of anything and everything if its for the highest good. This is why I also feel it is important to discuss even those things which are taboo, illegal or just blocked by man made rules.
Rules that are completely made up by other people, people who are no more intelligent than you and are and in no way better than you. Rembering again the wise words of Terence McKenna: “Nobody is more smarter than you”.
With entheogenics, I feel the main reason these plants have been made illegal, is the fear of the controlling factions, of people discovering natural healing methods, our true connection to nature and each other, and ultimately, the fear of the realization that we all humans are one.
When we realize that we are all one, nations, rules, laws, politicians, kings and queens disappear, their power dissolves. It has been a very effective method in controlling our thoughts, but no longer can this method survive, as the truth is coming here more powerfully now, more enlightening and ultimately along it dissolving all that is un-truthful.
It is time to bring that to the surface which has been hidden and again reveal our connection to the nature and to the cosmos around us.
This writing is part of what has helped me re-member this connection to everything and all that is. Part of what has helped me discover who I am, to heal those wounds deep within me, and ultimately to remember who I am.
I also want to state out that currently the most powerful tools I have in my arsenal are meditation and living in the moment, and trusting the process of flow. Entheogenics have definitely helped me break down those shields inside me to see this way. Sometimes you need dynamite to break down hard walls.
‘Here be dragons .. ‘
I do not recommend anybody take any entheogenics without consulting somebody who knows more, as there is the very real possibility of getting more lost than finding yourself. I have had to find that the hard way, not with mushrooms, but especially later with cannabis, and seen also from friends around me that it’s very possible to lose part of yourself in the process, especially if you want to go too far and desire to know too much.
It’s not something you can easily do, as natural plants usually give you a warning if you are venturing too deep, or pushing it too much, but out of ignorance you can always not listen to the warnings and push deeper than is good for you. I’ve been on the edge couple of times, luckily my intuition has been in most cases sensitive enough to pull back and not venture too far, but I have sensed that there is the definite possibility of losing something, experiencing something that cannot be un-experienced and seeing “too much” at one time.
It’s beneficial to have humility and respect when approaching these plant teachers. Respecting these plants and their spirits, and looking into tradition for clues how to approach this healing, but not blindly following tradition either, as in the western world we don’t have the same context as many people who still natively use these in their culture have.
In this text, I am exploring and sharing experiences with my relationship with the plant that helped me realize that there are such things as truly spiritual experiences, and which helped me remember that I am the Universe, not just an powerless experiencer going through a ready made world.
Food of the Gods
I am talking about the children of the earth, those small mycelium rooted friends of us, known better by their street name magic mushrooms, Psilocybin mushrooms, or Food of the Gods, as termed by the late Terence McKenna.
My first experience with plant medicine was with mushrooms. One day a good friend came over, and told me he just happened to have some. I was 26 then, I didn’t have any experience of any mind altering substances other than alcohol and some cannabis I had tried with some friends couple of times, but not knowing how to inhale properly and not resulting in a proper experience.
I was intrigued, I had no idea what the effects of eating such things was. I felt a somewhat mystical feeling, I had heard that people eat them and feel funny, see colors and such stuff, so I was interested, why not, let’s do it.
We agreed to do this with a group of friends, most of who were first timers also. We did not really prepare in anyway, except we knew not to eat heavily before and had made sure we had nowhere to go that night.
Eating a small dose of dried mushrooms, maybe something between 1.5 and 2 grams, resulted slowly in a state where my whole reality was changed, and I could see things from a completely new angle. I’m not going to go into the details more, as other people have written much better about the effects, but I want to share one profound realization I had.
I found something very deep inside me. Something Universal, something that was connected to Everything. I felt that I was this Universe that I inhabited, instead of just living in it.
I still remember that moment vividly, what I saw and felt, a blue starry nebula with a dark starry background, filling my vision completely behind my eyelids, and realizing, “I am this”.
I was then still struggling with dark thoughts, thoughts of suicide and escaping everything, and I was this very rational person, relying on logic and my intelligence on most things. This realization gave me a grand feeling of hope, that I’m not just my thoughts, that I am not alone, that I am something greater than I was used to thinking,
That I am not just just this small human, but my existence has meaning and it is meaningful. The very profound action of just being able to exist felt very important and unique. That I don’t have to try any harder and that I’m perfect. Just by being, I am complete.
If I am all of this I am experiencing, how can it not be perfect ?
This was the most memorable revelation from that experience. That there is so much more than I had been told by everybody around me. It was like somebody had taken the veil off from my eyes for a while, showed me a glimpse of what is really true in this world and then put the veil back on.
This sparked the question:
‘What the heck is going on here actually ? How can I feel like I am the Universe, when I am just a human ?’
This was what I would call my first real spiritual experience. I got very interested in spirituality, religions and shamanism, read a lot of books and writings on the subject, scoured through online forums seeking answers to my questions and wrote down pages and pages of thoughts on the subject.
Now that I’ve had experience with other entheogenics also, and a more holistic view of the whole process, after picking up daily meditation and writing about these things, discussing, experiencing, reading and digesting the things I’ve gone through over 10 years, I’ve come to a sort of conclusion for now that psilocybin mushrooms are teacher plants.
More teachers than healers, although great healers too, but their role seems to be more of a information carrier, presenting us a way to connect to their vast mycelia network of consciousness, and their deep knowledge they have developed over millions and millions of years of existing within the very soil of our planet Earth and even other planets and galaxies.
On what information do I base this ? On direct communication and discussing the topic with the various mushroom beings I have been in contact with.
I say beings, as they too are conscious lifeforms, like you and me. But they are very different, their physical body not resembling anything of ours, but more like a network of connections on a physical level, and we are just digesting their sexual organs, their means of reproduction that pops up to the ground level.
They have told me directly where they come from, shown me in visions. The spirit of the mushroom can communicate with you, and you can communicate with it. Something not really talked about in many places, but it is definitely possible and even preferable, as the dialogue helps the healing and teaching process.
Opening up the healing interfaces
By letting go and allowing the plant spirit to heal and teach on all possible levels, for the highest good of yourself, is a revelation that came to me later in my journeys.
First I was sort of a passive experiencer, communicating with the plants along the journey, but not doing it in a more conscious way right from the start of the experience.
Later I realized that by allowing consciously the plant to heal you, on all possible levels and interfaces, opening up all the methods that are for the highest best of yourself, by saying this aloud to the plant in the beginning of the session, miraclous things can happen.
By consciously opening up the interface and allowing the healing, the plant can work much more directly with you and let the healing through in much more efficient ways. It’s like opening up the firewalls of your body and soul, it requires trust and letting go of all the shields, but according to my experience it’s definitely worth it.
Some of these beings have shown me their intellect in ways that feels like they are much, much more intelligent beings than we humans, even thousandfold. I say some, as there are younger and older mushroom spirits, as there are young human souls and old human souls, with various levels of methods and experience under their belt so to speak.
The teaching and healing seems to also be relative to what you can accept and input on your own level, and also on what wisdom the particular mushroom spirit has gathered during it’s development as an soul. Some young souls can appear naive, trying to help you their best, but not really grasping the process, and some old soul mushrooms can be truly marvelous in what wisdom they can impart on you and what healing methods they use.
One particular old soul mushroom healed me from the very edges of my whole being, not only on a physical level, but I could feel it working on all of my astral bodies at the same time, starting from the very edge of the existence of my soul, and somehow this healing then reflected back to my physical body.
That felt truly amazing, as the mushroom being somehow transferred my whole consciousness to feel how it exists during this process, in order to achieve this. Encompassing my whole being in the way it felt life, allowing me to transform into this mushroom for a while somehow magically. I could see and feel the mushroom spirit directly in front of me, feeling like I was this spirit, not separated and experiencing, but becoming it, allowing the plant to directly take over for a while and seek out the places where it could help me for my highest good.
This particular experience felt very alien, very technological, like experiencing and transforming into a being one hundred thousand times more intelligent than what I’ve ever experienced, feeling directly what it felt to be this particular entity in some very direct and odd way.
I was totally humbled by the experience, and the realization hit me of how limited our human experience still is compared to those who have truly went beyond this physical dimension. I’ve never felt anything like that before or after.
Some of these beings have told me that they have travelled to this planet from a far away place, shooting through our atmosphere, and taking root within the soil of this planet at a time when there still was no human life even on our planet. Mushroom spores have been scientifically proven being able to withstand the high pressure, heat and coldness of being able to fly in here from space.
Explaining to me how their intelligence through the mycelia consciousness network spans multiple planets and even Universes. Showing me how these antennae networks are all connected, and can communicate telepathically, transferring information from the very edges of our galaxy. Spreading galactic wisdom and cosmic consciousness to humans and other living beings here on planet Earth.
Conscious communication interface
For this kind of direct communication be possible, my theory is that the mushroom has developed the psilocybin molecule, when ingested orally metabolizes into psilocin, which closely resembles the serotonin molecule, our natural neurotransmitter.
The psilocin is thought to bind onto the same receptors in our brain as serotonin, allowing somehow a direct interface and way to communicate with us through the receptacles in our prefrontal cortex.
I speculate that the mushroom has developed this molecule also to communicate with other plants around it in nature, as it is highly dependent on trees, soil and other vegetation to give it food and the proper environment to grow. It has been proven also that mushrooms can clean up soil and remove toxins from their environments just by absorbing those into their flesh and transforming it somehow, so it is beneficial for the host plants also to let the mushroom to grow in their bodies and surroundings.
This interface, I feel, allows the spirit of the plant to communicate also with us, if we allow it, in a state of union, without the need for traditional spoken language. You can resist the experience of course, and that can lead to a frightening and bad experience, but if you work with the plant and allow the healing and coming together to happen, amazing things can manifest.
For example, one particular strand of mushrooms focused purely on healing my teeth and mouth area, working on that particular area for an hour or two, while I had to lay there in complete silence and acceptance, feeling how something that had stuck between my teeth was being removed, dark thoughts and dark words that had got stuck somehow inside my mouth. Using some sort of spiralling technology to pull out the heavy energies, I could see these rainbow spirals that the mushroom spirit was somehow utilizing to put the energy to movement and transform it into light.
In other examples, they have helped me to show how my brain works, given many direct teachings about how our society operates, how the universe is mathematically constructed and much more that I won’t go into too much detail here.
Revealers of truth
These plants can also teach you things that shake the foundation of our very western so-called-civilization, and can cast light onto the truth behind the very core structures that drive many religions and other control based organisations.
This is one of the reasons I believe, that the powers that be, have wanted to ban and kill paganistic and shamanistic mushroom rituals that have already existed for thousands of years in our cultural upbringing, and have possibly been even very closely knitted together with the whole evolution of our species as humans.
The reality is, that we have lived with these plants and their spirits for as long as we have existed. There can be found proof of ritualistic usage of mushrooms and other entheogenic plants from all around the world, in all cultures, in all times that we have proof from in forms of writings, images, songs and stories.
Where ever there have been humans, there have been shamans, healers, people who communicate with the nature around the tribe, the plants, the spirits and with the galactic beings who work together with us.
This knowledge has been widely killed off by the major religions, instead offering in place control placed, fear based, monoteistic, un-natural belief systems with some truth in them but major factions twisted and darkened away from the original truth, modified to only serve the purpose of the control structures built around the need of people to seek the divine withim themselves.
The time for these factions is slowly coming to an end, and part of this process is the legalization, research and study of entheogenics to be used in healing and learning contexes.
Cost of banning discussion
I’ve gotten considerable help from my experiences with various other teacher plants and mushrooms, but not at all without a cost.
As speaking about these things has been made difficult, it can result to not knowing what to do, not having a tradition or a framework around the healing, easily resulting in not-so-optimal results sometimes and having to figure out things by yourself, without having a teacher showing how to do it properly and how to bring back those teachings into your life.
I would hope that by opening more about my experiences, and breaking through the barriers of communication, I can also inspire others to write about their experiences, and share their insights, so that we would have more knowledge and wisdom on how to approach this subject now and in the future.
Currently it can require considerable courage to see beyond the stigma, as we have been brainwashed to think that only medicine that comes in pill form from a doctor is the correct way, but as we are learning more and more, this not the truth also anymore.
It feels we are at an point in our evolution where we are looking back to nature for the methods on how to continue living on this planet, rational thinking alone cannot cut it anymore as we have seen from the results currently plaguing our society.
I see a bright future for us, and feel we are again remembering who we truly are. In this process, the natural healers can help us regain our connection to our true selves. It is not something that should just be dismissed and put to the side, as many people really need the help these teachers and healers can offer, in order for us to evolve again as a species towards something greater, more unified and even regaining back our cosmic connection.
I hope this writing gives some insight onto what the mushroom plants can offer us. I plan to continue writing more about these subjects, from the only viewpoint I have, deep and to the core, discussing also about other teacher and healer plants.
I wish to encourage people to share their experiences, and open up personally, as this is the only way for us to break the code of silence.
By taking action and doing, you are always opening up paths for others, who think in silence, to take action too! ^_^